I am so going to die. Bleah~
I see codes until my eyes wanna pop out liao. Until my head hurts like there's someone using a needle hammer hitting away at my head.
Gee.
And I'm still blogging.
Cannot. I want to whine.
All I can think of, is how am I so going to die when I see my fyp prof next week.
All I can think of, is how am I so going to die when I have to update project status next week.
Sorry hor, not next week. in 3 friggin' days.
Cat got 9 lives leh. Jesslyn got how many lives leh?
9 lives also?
No lar. Not so fortunate. More than that leh.
Cannot run away from it even after dying 9 times. So sad!!
Bleah~
It's funny you know, part of me wishes I was working now.
I kinda miss my IA days. 
Although it comes with waking up early and getting stucked in a chilly arctic-conditioned office for 9 hours everday...
I enjoyed it! Hahaha. 
Maybe not so much of the working part. But more of the "have friends and have fun slacking part."
Not to mention there will be constant moolah going into my account every month.
Even though it's a measly 500 bucks.
500 bucks enough for me to go BKK and shop like a mad woman you know! 
Saying that, I wanna go BKK again.
My mom just came back from BKK and bought a pair of fake Birkies for me! 
I like!
And I think she's much better at bargaining. She got 1 pair for 150B. She bought only 3 pairs.
Why do I think she's much better at bargaining leh?
Because, like her, my present fake Birkies also cost 199B originally. While I bought 2 pairs and managed to cut the price down to 180B, she managed to cut a quarter of the price off.
My friend who went BKK and bought 12 pairs at one go, only managed to cut the price to 160B.
That's why I think my mom damn power.
So I have new shoes now! But I still feel like I'm so going to die.
Gee. I can never be contented, can I? Haha.
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 4:02 PM
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Okie. I am feeling philosophical now. Hahaha. But then before I begin on my philosophies, some rambles for the past few days.... Bah~ This sucks lar. I hate the feeling of being so bogged down with work. And then feeling guilty for every minute that I am not doing work. Like now. And I hate the feeling of having to drag myself to school. Having to do my fyp which, at this moment, I have stumbled onto a large piece of BLOCK and I seem to not be able find a way around it. So irritating!! And I realised it's been a long time since I posted any photos, or written nonsense (aka my rambles) in my jesslyn's Singlish. Hahahaha. I realised that I'm kinda grammatically correct with accurate vocab for the last "more serious" posts. And I think this is the way I used to write when I had my journal few years back. Oh, it was all about my crushes and my crushes and my crushes...well, that's the picture. And this blog is all about my un-happiness with clement. Wahahaha. How apt. Okie. I am very pleased with my pedicure as of today still, because I think it looks damn nice lar! Bright and shiny, and my nail is nicely shaped. Oh...why haven't I discovered the wonders of pedicure earlier? So now I shall look for a place to do manicure. Yay! Haha. Oh, and I finally see why so many people like OPI nail polishes. It just looks good on the nail. And it's actually quite hard to chip once it dries. My pedicured toe had 3 coats of polish, so well, clumsy me knocked against clement's slipper while walking, and one toe's polish was damaged. So wasted!! And this post was interrupted because I had to do survey questionnaire for my project. So troublesome! Bleah~ I need moolah! Lots of it! I want to buy PDA! Hahaha. I don't mind working but now I'm so friggin' busy that I want to work also got no time. Unless I become superwoman or 神 lar, then maybe can. Then again, if I'm a 神, then I don't need to work lar! I can just And my philosophical mood is gone because I interrupted this post by doing the survey questionnaire. Sian 1/2. And I'm whining here. Gee. Must be PMS out in full force. Hahaha. Actually when I have PMS I always like to tickle clement. That's because I'm feeling miserable and I would like to ease my miserable-ness by making someone happy. And I know I can make clement the Happiest Man In the World by tickling him non-stop! And after that I feel so happy that I made him so happy. LoL!!!! Actually, he scared tickle one. And he laughs when he gets tickled. But I don't care! Hahaha. In the past, he says by being with me, he's the happiest man in the world. So I'm just proving his statement true lor.... Oh, I'm such a 伟大 (aka noble) girlfriend!!!
But it's okay, I still have 9 pretty and perfect toes! Wahahaha!
and then a PDA will appear! Hahaha! Like this also good. Not to mention I will have lots of moolah to go a long with! Hiak hiak. I must be dreaming too much...it's late.
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 2:40 AM
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You like to be in touch with the in-crowd, in touch with what's new, and making sure you have the best of it. You appreciate design, and quality. You can give a 120% when you need to, but know that you don't need to 100% of the time. You know that life is for living, and you're smart enough to make sure that you have time to relax, chill and just be yourself.
You come across to many as a patient, people person who is a good listener, adaptable and accommodating to others. You have the ability to "go with the flow" of your surroundings. This ability is both your biggest strength and weakness; at best, you're very accepting and supportive of others as they really are, but at worst you can sometimes forget who you yourself are, passively agreeing with others and reticent to assert your own desires.
You may have a particularly hard time when making painful decisions, like firing someone, because you also see the other person's predicament, and hate to force confrontations. Sometimes you can find it hard to get started on things. However, this inertia can also work to your advantage, because once started you will make slow-but-steady progress, becoming determined and relentless in your pursuits.
Famous people who share these traits include:Bill Clinton, Carl Jung, Nelson Mandela, Tiger Woods, Prince Charles, Ronald Reagan, Albert Einstein, Dwight Eisenhower*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I'm in the league of Bill Clinton and Tiger Woods! Hahaha! =p
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 12:38 PM
You are tired of the various 'ups' and 'downs' of life at this time. If only you could win a lottery - or better still, be the heir to a large inheritance which would allow you to afford a life of absolute luxury. This day dreaming will shortly pass and whether you like it or not, sooner or later you will have to face reality.
Most people are conditioned by their environment and you are no exception. You are an extremely emotional person - so much so that 'the wrong word' can lead you to tears. You feel other people's pain. You feel the need of sympathetic relationships and a pleasant work environment in order to develop and grow. You are an impulsive, loving individual with a great deal of inherent feeling.
Nothing seems to be going right for you and you are thwarted every way you turn. You are not at all happy with the situation but it would appear that there is very little that you can do about it at this time. Sit back and let the situation take its course, because at this time you feel that there is nothing you can do to change whatever needs to be changed.
It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.
You are putting on a show - a facade. You are a master of demonstrating considerable charm in the hope that this can or will lead to better things. Deep down you are fearful that this may not work and that you may have to employ other strategies in order to realize all your ambitions.
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 2:03 AM
A short one because I have tons of work to do. *cries*
I went JB today! I went for my virgin pedicure session today! But it's an express one. Haha. Cheap cheap!
And we spent 200 ringgit in Watson's today! I want to puke blood liao.
I watched Flightplan today! Very very very very good movie!
Okie. And I just meddled with this:
It's a test that has been done to death. Haha. I remembered doing the same test a few years back. But I don't remember the results anymore. Anyway I don't think it's accurate for me, because I think I take more than I give in relationships. Something light-hearted for a change, I think I have been sounding rather morbid in my previous posts. Well, in a mere 3 days, I cleared 2 presentations and 3 quizzes. Haha. How superb I am!! Plus I had 3 quizzes! Oh my gosh. I think I started studying proper on Friday for all 3. So it was like a last-minute rush and of course, my little brain couldn't absorb anything after a while. Even sponges get soaked right? My brain just stopped functioning at a certain time at a certain day. So irritating!! I went IMM on Monday to meet clement for dinner. This is besides the point! Haha. So on Monday, I went Daiso, then found that Diet Patch on sale! So excited! Haha. I think I grabbed like 4 packs at one go, until clement reminded me that I shouldn't buy so many since I never tried it before. So okay lor...I put one pack back. So now I have 3, and since there are 3 patches in it, so it's a one week's supply! Anyway in the end I bought some cooling patch for the neck and back, tried one and found it very useful! So today is day 1 of the diet patch usage. I shall monitor my weight to see whether I will actually get lighter or not! So, 减肥, here I come!! These days, I have been lemming for an MP3 player, and a PDA. Ah! PDA is a bigger headache because I don't know how's the market like. Anyway, since PDAs can play mp3s, I have decided to lump the 2 together so that I can cut costs (not save money leh...) and yet still get the 2 things I want! But it's all in the range of 800 bucks! So for now, I have to make do without both PDA and mp3 player. My irritating sister always take mine to school...so I am music-less everyday when I go to school. Like so sad! I asked her to get her own but she claims she do not have time to go get one so might as well use mine. Like, what kind of logic!! But if I get my own PDA, it will stick to me at all times and all hours of the day man. Will never let it go! Hahaha. How You Are In Love 
You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often.
You tend to give more than take in relationships.
You need your space and privacy. You don't like to be smothered.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.
But then again, I don't have much cheery stuffs to say. I just finished a very tedious and tiring 1st-3-days-of-the-week. Which means today is Thursday, I get to rest at last. 
I feel super because somewhere in the middle of last week, I was freaking out badly and I thought I never could have survived. It's like, 2 presentations, of which 1 was done last minute right on the morning of the day itself. The other presentation was a more formal one, required much preparation and had 2 different segments to it. In other words, that one was so tedious, I spent an entire day in school discussing with my project mates. And we all almost died in the hot and humid canteen B... 
Anyway, out of the 3, I screwed up 2. 
What's new? A reminder to be more hardworking than ever now I guess...
We have had lots of talks between us for the past week, and I think he finally knows how I feel. I hope so...because sometimes even though he claims to know, somehow I think he takes it the wrong way. 
Sigh. It's hard to make guys understand anything! Oh well, but I hope he gets what I meant. Anyway, we are supposed to talk about it more in depth once my 3 quizzes and 2 presentations are out of the way, so I guess it's either tomorrow or Saturday? 
I want to talk about my purchases from Daiso! 
I'm a huge fan, everytime I go IMM I will definitely go to that shop. And everytime I go there I will definitely buy more stuffs, be it useful or useless. 
I think my house is going to be overrun by Daiso's stuffs liao. Haha. Anyway! I am so excited because there was this Diet Patch that's been on sale in Daiso for quite some time but I never got to buy it. It's always out-of-stock! Actually there was this similar patch to prevent constipation, I bought it but haven't tried it yet. 
Very kiasu right? Maybe because I have never seen it on sale while I was there so the auntie in me decided to grab more. 
Like when you do work and bend over at long hours, the neck and back area could get very stiff. I found it very effective in soothing the ache! Like the Yoko-Yoko that I always use. And then I bought hand cream for myself. I have lots already but I just can't stop buying more. 
If I do, then next time I will buy many many patches. Such a simple way of losing weight...paste a sticker and then it will cut your appetite. Or, it's supposed to anyway. Nevertheless, it doesn't matter! If I lose weight by eating less, also good! Then I can maintain also. Haha.
I was looking at either Creative Neeon, or the iPod Nano. The Creative Neeon because I find that it's customizable so it's much better (and cheaper!) than G-Masking it. And the iPod Nano because it's so so so chio! Went to BiG at Harbourfront the other day and saw it, and then I fell in love with it. So sleek. And so nice. And so pretty. And so nice. And so sleek. And so chio. Hahaha...I think I am delirious already. I was fortunate enough to meet a PDA guru yesterday. LoL! And then he recommended me which models of PDA I should go for. Since my top priority is Wi-Fi, and mp3, and I wanted something below 500 bucks. He suggested iPaq. And I think iPaq is good! (Just like iPod Nano! Haha. All starts with 'i') 
I feel poor just thinking of buying it. 
Oh well, maybe wait for the price to drop or go get it from some lobang. My PDA guru has got a few lobangs. But alas, don't have the model which suits my budget and my requirements. All sold out! So there IS actually one that suits the budget and requirements. I hope the stocks come in soon. Haha. 
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 12:36 PM
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I am so pissed.
The only time I'm free to sit down and study...
The stewpig website for all my lect notes and tutorials is down.
How to study like that!!!!
Which means I will have to download ALL the lect notes and tutorials into my computer to prevent this from happening again. *shrugs*
Very tedious leh!!!
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 8:10 PM
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What is love?
Does love makes your heart beat faster?
Does love makes you want to do your best?
Does love gives you a source of motivation that's imcomparable to others?
Does love allows you that extra energy no matter how tired you are?
I, have no answer to all these questions above. Actually, I have no answer to love.
I am starting to see certain things in a clearer light now, and am no longer living in the cosy world I created/imagined/dreamt out.
And of course, there are things which are to be worked out, and I hope I can work it out, either with him or within me. It suddenly dawned on me that he is not the problem, I am. I have a huge/good memory for all the bad things and a bad memory for all the good things.
How ironical, isn't it?
And I just realised that some issues are never solved...a friend that I met up with today, and was teling him some stuffs. He said I told him the same things 2 years ago... and 2 years later, I still have yet to have done anything about it.
I guess, there's nothing much to speak of my progress, isn't it? But hey, 2 years later, I would like to believe that I'm a changed person. Like, someone who knows her limits, knows her place, someone who doesn't go beyond the line, someone who's definitely more matured and knowledgable, wise and understanding, plus the fact that she's really older.
The same friend told me that I'm probably numb already. I don't know if it applies to me. I have enough of tears and all those unpleasant feelings that I've felt for the last 2 years. It's been a long long time...even longer to have finally gotten my feelings and head sorted out nice and neat. Right now I feel in control. So no, I'm probably not numb, because I still feel the rush of tears sometimes. But this time, I'll be in control.
If the tears come, I will create the dam to block it.
If the tears trickle, I will blot it away.
If the tears fall, I will wipe it off my face.
But never, will the tears come in torrents which I have no control over, ever again.
And never, will I have to feel that sense of helplessness which overwhelms me from time to time.
Because I'm in control.
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 2:11 AM
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This sucks.
My fyp prof is breathing down my neck for the fyp data...but how to give! My fyp data is non-existent. Sheesh~ And then he has scheduled for us to meet him next week. Hopefully, this week will be a fruitful one for me to present something to him. If not, it will really reflect very badly on us leh...somemore this time round we will see other groups too!!
I have a presentation for another yet-to-be-started project in the 1st week! Why yet-to-be-started? Due to numerous unforeseen circumstances the project never managed to get off ground. Or if it did...it hovered for like, 5 seconds before it fell back to earth. Haha...what a funny analogy huh. =p That's the scenario in this case anyway.
The bad thing is, it's gonna be graded and marks will be awarded for the final grade!! So if we present nothing now, no matter how good a presentation we do for the final one will not make much of a difference. They say, 1st impressions count, right? So I can foresee...if we don't do it well for this presentation then no matter how spectacular everything turns out it won't matter.
Most importantly, this sucks because my prof didn't exactly mentioned it in class, or when the semester started. He only did so via email. So right now we haven't got anything done! Panic!!!
On a brighter note, I'm going to meet the gang for dinner tonight! Yay!
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 1:13 PM
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Am I lonely?
No lar. 34% only. Where got lonely right?
But why does it feel like I'm the only one in this world sometimes? Why does that person, who promises to be always there for me, go missing when I need that person most?
And why when that person, whom always tells me will be there for me, brings me such fear?
And why do I feel that fear when I hear that someone wants to be there for me?
I don't understand why I am feeling this way.
I have always thought that family is very important. I try to make them accept me. But ultimately, I can't accept them.
Like, what an irony right?
I have been doing so much to make them accept me. But it turns out that I can't accept them, the way they handle things, the way they do things, and, I dunno, the way that someone is handling it.
And I have this feeling to run, far far away where that someone can never find me. So that there will be no hurt for that someone. I can't hurt that someone, because that someone did nothing wrong. But I can't leave that someone and not hurt that someone at the same time.
What to do ???
I believe.
That marriages do not always work.
That being together doesn't mean forever.
Having a kid won't solve problems.
That love doesn't conquer all.
That money doesn't make the world go round.
That screwed-up people exists whether you like it or not.
That hypocrites are running amok all over.
That words only weigh their worth in the right situation.
That love is not everything.
That being married doesn't cancel out the insecurity.
That I have a bad brain for recording all things bad and horrible.
That I cannot forgive and forget easily...or ever.
That I am such a mean and unforgiving person.
That I am just being so screwed up myself.
Just being cynical.
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 7:15 PM
| Your dating personality profile: Stylish - You do not lack for fashion sense. Style matters. You wouldn't want to be seen with someone who doesn't care about his appearance. Athletic - Physical fitness is one of your priorities. You find the time to work athletic pursuits into your schedule. You enjoy being active. Sensual - You are not particularly shy when it comes to your sexuality. You know what you like and do not feel inhibited. | Your date match profile: Stylish - You cannot put up with someone who is lacking in style. You want an original, someone with flare, someone with good taste. Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living. Athletic - You aren't looking for a couch potato. You seek someone who is active and who keeps his body in top shape. |
Your Top Ten Traits 1. Stylish 2. Athletic 3. Sensual 4. Wealthy/Ambitious 5. Adventurous 6. Outgoing 7. Intellectual 8. Liberal 9. Romantic 10. Traditional | Your Top Ten Match Traits 1. Stylish 2. Practical 3. Athletic 4. Adventurous 5. Sensual 6. Outgoing 7. Intellectual 8. Romantic 9. Wealthy/Ambitious 10. Big-Hearted |
Do I dare say it?
Okie. KNNBCCB!
There, I said it. Haha. =p
Damn irritated because I dragged myself up this morning to go to school for a project discussion, only to discover on my way there that someone aeroplaned us. WTF.
It was about 10.45AM, and my friend called to tell me that he couldn't find the other group member in his hall room. So it turns out that he went off some time in the night but didn't inform anyone. And he didn't inform anyone that he wanted to cancel the meeting. So win already lor!!!
The other group mate, my friend, told me to let it go...don't think about it. But I can't!! I'm in a whiny mood (thanks to PMS) and I cannot NOT let it go. And so I whined non-stop to my poor friend lor. Hehehe. Luckily my friend had friends in hall, so in the end we bunked at someone's hall and then while the morning away chit-chatting and eating. Haha!
So okie, I was kept entertained till 2pm, then I rushed off for my tutorial already. Yay! So I was a good girl because I attended a tutorial. But I skipped 2 lectures after that and went home. Haha. Like 1 good thing minus out 2 bad things huh. :p
Maybe because I have PMS, I am getting very irritated with Clement. Dunno leh. I will snap at him over the phone. And that's after I told him to sleep and he wanted to speak to me and so I spoke to him and then I started to snap at him because he sounded so sleepy. Like, I should be happy that he wants to talk even though he's tired right? But I find that I get very impatient...and so I snap at him lor. Very bad of me, but I can't help it.
I dunno what to do with my attitude sometimes...
Stunningly Gorgeous Y 11:11 PM
